Apathetic Week.

That's right folks! This week is Apathy Awareness week! Are you aware of your own apathy? i sure am.

Well at least when it comes to work anyhow. It's not that i'm not working, because i definitely am working. I am working my tail off... it's just that i don't seem to care any more. Which, when you work for a nonprofit that specializes in a historically under funded field, caring is about all you have going for you. Caring for the people you're helping, caring about the programs and projects and your co-workers... it is, after all, a cause.

But quite frankly, i don't care right now. I'm sure i'll care again some day... maybe tomorrow.  But for today, i keep casting longing glances over my shoulder and out the window into the hot and bright spring day on the other side... taunting me... sneering and jeering at my inability to enjoy it. stupid day...

I think we should have "sun days" like "snow days" - we should be able to cut out of work early on days as beautiful as today. what is wrong with our society??

Narcissistic me

Anyone else ever use a company called photoworks?  I used to use it a long time ago, ya know back when film cameras existed... anyhow, they're closing and all the digital photos they had stored for me needed to be transfered, and i forgot about most of these photos... anyhow... i found a bunch, and because i'm always a little uncomfortable sharing pics of other people without their permission (minus ben and the babies), here's a bunch of pictures of me... from january 2003... 

This is pretty awesome... (yes, another cop out cause i'm busy and i'm cold)

As Seen on Facebook

ok, so i totally realize that this is cheating. BUT, since some of you maybe, possibly, don't keep up with facebook and all it's horrors here's a bunch of photos i probably posted on facebook once upon a time. 

I also realized that i didn't mention on here (at least i don't think i did??) that we cut Esther's hair short. It was driving her crazy for a while and said she wanted it very short so we complied. And she's super adores-able.

Anyhow, here's a bunch of photos to keep you in the loop more or less until i can get my act together enough to write a decent post and keep up with the blog.

apology...

i just wanted to apologize for being so MIA these days. As we all know (because i've stated it innumerable times) March = not good... so i've been plugging along working a lot... and waiting as patiently as i possibly can (which isn't much) for spring.

spring is peeking up all over these last couple weeks though. And though i'm as bipolar as the weather, things are beginning to be a bit more promising. The kids are now going to bed at 8 rather than 7 since daylight savings (i refuse to acclimate them to the new time so shoot me) which opens up a wealth of social possibilities. Namely, we're starting up our weekly dinners with j&i again (sooooooo happy about this!). In light of my increasing lack of creativity, and busy schedules, and because they're driving to us every week so we can put the kiddos down to sleep and still hang with them after - we're implementing Fiesta Fridays!! (consisting of mexican cuisine - or as close to it as i can come-, and tequila... or not...)

Let's see... anything else new? not really... trying to prepare stock for our booth at fairie festival but also not really getting anything done, anxious for ben and my baby free get away april 17-18 (we're spending the night at a b&b in federal hill), and other than that working working working.

OH and my new 5 year plan has us moving to Africa in 3 years for a year or so...

Happy Heart

So, Asa's heart murmur is what they call innocent or functional. His heart is strong. He does not need to have antibiotic treatments or avoid activities. He will not need blood thinners or anything like that. He is a healthy wee man.

We have an appointment with a pediatric endocrinologist april 4th because he's so very small. We'll let you know how that goes.  Our pediatrician did call us with the blood test results and x-ray results and so far everything looks fine. No thyroid problems or anything like that. His skeletal age is 15 months. And though i read all about it on wikipedia i'm not sure i fully understand skeletal age vs. true age. It sounds like having a younger skeletal age means he will grow for longer so could potentially catch up to his peers by adulthood, but i'm not entirely sure.

Anyhow, we're breathing easier knowing he has a good heart.

however, i hate march. and we all have colds. COME ON APRIL!!!!

Cardboard and duct tape...

Poor kid

So...

Asa has a heart murmur. likely it's nothing. gunna take him to see a pediatric cardiologist and also a pediatric endocrinologist (hopefully) next week.

Bragging on Ben

Have i mentioned lately how i married a really incredible, totally maudlin (though he wouldn't admit it even in the face of chinese torture -- ask me how i know!), sexy, sweet, and doting person??

Well, if i haven't. Guess what kind of person i married! an incredible, maudlin, sexy, sweet, and doting person!

For Valentine's day he surprised me by coordinating with my folks to watch the kids over night and reservations at a b&b just up the road a-piece (did i just say "a-piece"?, i did, i live in the woods... gimme a break).

We, unlike my parents, had a wonderful time! went out for sushi... and... well... you get it. A room all to ourselves... with a bed... and NO ONE ELSE around (we were the only guests in the house!)...

so, yeah. i'm a lucky girl...

Boston, Kit, a lot of wine, and memories...

So, my Boston trip... i can hear your anticipation, just waiting to see when, if, what i'm going to write about it...

It was... it was a hiccup in time. A worm hole from the now to not quite then... but somewhere in between perhaps.

It has not been an easy decade for Kit or her family. I think i actually heard that little *snick* sound when as my heart broke over and over for her as she relayed the last ten years to me over seven, yes SEVEN bottles of wine... or was it eight?

I do not want to go into the specifics of any of it because this is after all the internet, and it is after all her life... but i do want to say that i am appalled, heart broken, so extremely sorry, and very, very angry about some of the stuff she's been through. I think i need to leave it at that for now...

On a more positive note. Kit is well. She is gorgeous and wonderful and full of stories of travel and excellent food. My god, that woman has good taste in cheese! oh and men too as it turns out. Charles (her wonderful big bear of a beau), Kit, Rocky (their sweet dog), and Becky (Kit's fabulous and oh-so-sweet mama - she came down for Saturday night, yay!!) spent the whole weekend catching up, drinking wine, eating cheese, looking at the splendid view, looking at pictures, talking about the old days (but not necessarily *good* old days), snuggling, laughing, and yours truly even teared-up a bit a couple of times...

I am hoping that it will be far less time between this visit with her and the next. It's been a difficult week. I haven't been feeling 100% plus all of the fun, but albeit interruptions in our daily routine is throwing everything off. And i have to miss a wonderful party this weekend to WORK. yes work. on a Sunday... until 7pm... :(

Her house on an ice cube, that looks like an ice cube but has a resplendent view!

Just before i left for the airport to go home...

On our walk around the island... -- what? you say? Boston is NOT an island. Yes, but Nahant is.  

He's sewing a button onto his own pants. I love a man who can sew!

a terribly flattering and lovely picture of Kit

letter to her kid

I love this letter to her kid. also she's awesome. read her blog (all you parenting types).

Also, woke up to a Valentine's Day miracle. awoke to the thumping of Esther coming down the stairs. I go to her in the dark and pick her up while she whimpers a bit and then says "night time is no fun". I sympathize and carry her upstairs. lay her in her bed, go over to check on Asa who is still sound asleep in his bed. I lay down on the sofa beside Esther's bed and then catch sight of the thin border of light around the curtain because the SUN IS COMING UP. BECAUSE IT IS ACTUALLY MORNING. The dim light gets brighter and bolder as i lay there listening to Esther roll over and over... and then sneeze...and then Asa's touseled head pops up like a jack in the box... (what am i getting at you're wondering?) we, yes, all four of us, slept in our own beds ALL NIGHT LONG!!! granted i think Esther woke me up around 6, but that's Morning! REAL morning. not like fake morning at 4:30 or 5.

so happy valentine's folks. also, the world is not a completely frigid hell today. so that's nice too.

What February reduces us to...

February and March are crazy times for me. Case in point --

 "are those underpants?" i hear you asking, why yes. they are. well actually Esther's mask is swimsuit bottoms, Asa's is underpants.

 did i just come back from trapeze? maybe...

or perhaps i just dress like this all the time. What? i didn't tell you i was a deranged and MIA christmas elf?

The Pen Story

struggling...

Maybe it's just today, or all the horrible stuff that keeps happening (read: people are dying...) but i'm not doing so hot these days (or maybe it's just today and the fatalist in me is kicking in).

sad, sad, sad,sadsadsadsad....

feb and mar are not my best months over all... i dream of one day having the money and time to run away for a few weeks during this time to somewhere sunny and warm and good smelling...

Ceci & Miah

i love these people!

March Distraction?

Just one more distraction during the month of March and i think i'll be able to make it through the winter homicide-free!  Any ideas?